After the great that has happened this week many people have proclaimed how good God is. We completely agree with them but not for the reasons they think.
God is good because He sent His son to die for us. He has given all mankind the opportunity to fellowship and spend eternity with Him. Thus not in hell. That is why God is good! Not because He did or didn’t do something (See The Will of God). This is the foundation for our faith and is the rock that should never change. His goodness can’t get greater. There is no extra credit if you are perfect to make you extra perfect. God is good.
As we have stated since our birth announcement, God is good not depending on what the circumstances around us look like. My heart breaks for all people (christian and non-christian) who tie there belief in God to the outcomes of life. That isn’t biblical and leads to very dark places and perverted versions of a religion. Not Christianity. If you are at that place where you are upset with God because of a loss, misfortune or life in general. Pray for God to give you His perspective and reason for the source of your pain. You are God’s child and there is nothing that you can do to bring Him closer to you than He already is. He wants you to bring that sorrow to Him. It breaks His heart to see you go through it and He has the perfect medicine for your ailments.
Prayer has been the most vital part of how Erika and I have been able to walk through all of this. We have tangibly felt God’s grace every single day. That grace is what has give us the perspective and fath to trust God, no matter the outcome. We have always known His goodness and arrived at the point where our belief in that goodness and love would never be shaken even if Abigial died. We are so very thankful for her life! Did we pray for Abigail’s healing every day? Yes, of course! We wanted our child to be healed. But we don’t think that 1 million prayers healed her. We don’t think prayers twist God’s arm to do so. If they did, then we (all Christians) would be responsible for all the bad things happening on the earth because we didn’t pray enough. Put that in your theological pipe and smoke it!
We believe those prayers softened our hearts to the Sprit of the Lord to prepare us for the journey ahead. Prayer is meant for us to have a clearer understanding of God’s plan and for Him to soften our hearts to His love, grace and mercy.
Does God hear our prayers? Of course! Does God answer prayers, yes but not always is the ways we want or expect. His answering of prayers depends on the heart of the person praying and if it aligns with the plans of God. The difficulty in this is that we don’t even know the true plans of our own heart, only God does. Is it ok to pray selfish prayers? Yes, God already knows your thinking them so speaking them to Him isn’t going to repulse or surprise Him. It’s the exact opposite! It brings you to a level of honesty in your relationship with Him that wasn’t there before. That veil has been pulled away from your relationship and God now has an opening to communicate with you.
“What happens if she dies?”
I’ve thought about that a lot over the past months. I’ve stared into the abyss of emotions of a child’s death. I would be heart broken beyond belief and would yell and scream at God but deep down I would know that He didn’t cause her death and He didn’t want all this to happen, but He had a reason to allow it to happen. What that was I many never have know but I know He does…
I wrote that many weeks ago before I knew what would happen. Now I have the just as many questions. Why is she alive? What makes her special? Why our family when so many others don’t getting the good news?
What I do know is that this will produce in me a thankfulness for my family, life, community and God greater than ever before. And I’ll need much more grace, love and mercy to find the answers. But in the end I may never know but I’m sure He does…